


and we had problems with love sometimes (to see it)

by mostlikelydefinentlymad



Series: ain't no cure for love [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Captain America: The First Avenger, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, M/M, POV Steve Rogers, Pining Steve Rogers, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Stucky - Freeform, fandom poetry, steve writes poetry, stucky poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-15
Updated: 2016-07-15
Packaged: 2018-07-24 03:33:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7491816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mostlikelydefinentlymad/pseuds/mostlikelydefinentlymad
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>don't move an inch until you feel me<br/>my body in your orbit, my fingers closing over yours<br/>(you know this touch)<br/>like the stained glass window at your mothers church with rainbow prisms on pale wrist<br/>thumb brushing over your pulse during mass, leaving invisible imprints - a map<br/>I made a map just in case you ever get lost - I won't be too far<br/>(remember me, remember)</p>
            </blockquote>





	and we had problems with love sometimes (to see it)

**Author's Note:**

> [a collection of scattered poetry from various years - ranging from 1937 to 2017]

**poetry by: steve rogers**

_(two are 2nd person POV)_

 ❤

1\. you will never find this

I gave up in a way and regret is something we share

that we do not want 

what it is and what we have is not removable

(1942)

 

2\. drinking at the bar and I haven't stopped thinking about you,

ice blue eyes 

the weight of your absence again

(december 1943)

 

3\. and we had problems with love sometimes,

to see it

(spring 1937)

 

4\. I broke down, coming out

remember that conversation?

summer 1937 with the wind in your hair

when I kissed your cheek and you whispered

_finally_

now I'm here with pink, blue and purple striped flags and a star on my chest

but you are not

(late summer 2016)

 

5\. you stand with back turned, metallic hand in your pocket as you point at the moon

there are words falling from your lips but I'm caught up in what it'd feel like to taste

sweet kiss under the stars and despite it all I cannot bring myself to touch you

fingers reach toward your shoulder, the edge of your skin and I wake up wanting

sheets wrinkled and cold, I miss you

(2014)

 

6\. hold onto my hand, breathe in deep - _merge_

don't move an inch until you feel me

my body in your orbit, my fingers closing over yours

_you know this touch_

 like the stained glass window at your mothers church with rainbow prisms on pale wrist

thumb brushing over your pulse during mass, leaving invisible imprints - a map

I made a map just in case you ever get lost - I won't be too far

_remember me, remember_

inhale, exhale, look

we could be anywhere, this could be the beginning

or the tattered shreds of the end

it all flickers in and out, black and white

garbled words on a static screen, rabbit ears on dials

unsteady on our feet like we've never walked this road before

like the prints of our shoes in the dirt have all of the answers _  
_

and I've been here before, I know each crooked tree

this is where I find you

(the sun rises, the dream scatters. it only hurts when I breathe)

(2014)

 

7\. your love is a fever, sweat damp on white pillowcases

right in all of the wrong places, wedged between where you left me and where I want to be

until I'm drowning in coffee as black as the night you shoved your way into my heart without permission

you didn't even have to try, no need for flashlight or even a compass

because all I ever needed to find my way home was the muffled beating of heart under skin

and I'd follow you to the boughs of hell if you asked me to

I swear I'd die holding your hand until the flames devoured us

but you're somewhere I can't reach tonight

and even still

the worst fate is this: the silence

(2015)

 

8\. I have the heart of a criminal, blood stains hiding scars

 _stitches_ , lets call them stitches

neat rows of black and white thread like the crisp corners of your best button up

thrift store fresh under hot iron when they covered my mothers grave with fresh soil

and I ran because they reminded me of how loose the threads were becoming

you, slipping away from me

her, making a home from dirt and earthworms

if I severed the strings, if I pushed you away

you'd never have to know how easily the heart bruises, how messily it hides its secrets

but I've never been good at concealing and you're used to the game by now

you know, with the crimson splotches and the _I'm never going to leave you_

but you do

_you do_

my heart is a crime scene

and I've got everyone fooled

(2015)

 

**(second person POV)**

9\. it's a nasty thing, love

grimy in the parts that daylight never touches

vomit on khaki's, the pair your mother mended by hand no less than fifteen times

it's green around the gills, icy where it should be warm

hot cocoa in frozen mug, never touches your tongue in the way that it should

it's taking the long way home because those four walls are as good as dead

and you're the sort of empty that makes a smile look plastic

friends notice but they don't ask - it's a catch 22

some days you silently beg them to poke holes in the facade because you've forgotten how to breathe

and if he were here he'd notice

on the better days you smile wider; try harder until they accept the beautifully packaged lie

they do not ask and you do not tell

(late 2016)

 

**(second person POV)**

10\. _what makes you happy?_

four words echo from the past, their bite now dialed down to zero

your mind rushes back to the before -

the dried on crud of it, the leftover stale nothingness that you called an existence

award worthy in a role that you'd rather not take, nine stars on a score of 1 to 10

and then there is the present-

it rises up to meet you, warmth at your side

legs overlapping, nose buried in the crook of his neck

stitches mending, each wall colored in another shade of blue

not the sort of blue that convinces you it's only water sliding down your cheeks in the shower, no

there are days like that when the heart refuses to comply but mostly

_mostly-_

you've moved on to another -

icy blue that catches in the moonlight

you sleep

you dream

you wake up in his arms

(autumn 2017)


End file.
